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Fun people are interesting – they tend to have diverse interests that they enjoy and have stories to share.
This isn’t to say that it’s just a matter of telling a few jokes until you manage to laugh them into bed. Once I understood the appeal of fun, I began to recognize how it formed the underpinnings of everything I’d learned up to that point – and how much I had seen it in action over the years.
When the feeling of pleasure at a person’s involvement in our lives outweighs the costs (someone who’s fun to hang around with but who causes problems through his behavior, for example) then we tend to be drawn towards that relationship over others.The brain increases dopamine and norepinephirine, which regulates the brain’s pleasure and reward centers.We associate the pleasure with the person and thus want to spend more time in their presence.My friend Miles – he who attracts women the way cheese attracts mice – was successful not just because he looked like the bastard son of Hugh Grant and Rob Lowe but because he knew how to be fun.He was naturally outgoing and positive and instinctively understood how to make people feel good, how to feel guy who liked to tease and play around with everyone – especially the girls he was attracted to – and they would respond with great enthusiasm.